“Extra! Extra!”

Before TV, radio, and the internet, people got their information from newspapers. In those days it was a lot harder to “tweet” out a message to the world. Newspaper carriers would call out the phrase “Extra! extra! Read all about it!” This indicated that there was “breaking news” that occurred after the originally intended newspaper had printed. An extra section was then printed to include the latest and greatest happenings.

news

I suspect the publishers had to be judicious with their additions. It was a massive undertaking. The stories had to be good enough to recoup the cost of production.

Today’s communication medium has no such limitation. This is unfortunate indeed. Why? We miss the main story! All day long we consume the “extra! extra!” stories. We are drowning in information but starving for wisdom. We are liable to waste time browsing rather than searching. Our minds are radically malnourished on the media’s nutrition plan.

THE CHALLENGE:  Get away from all the “extra” information you don’t need. If you are following my blog (thank you) it means you STILL have goals and aspirations to fulfill, which means you need TIME to make them happen. Do you really need to scroll your social media, again?  Do you really need to open that junk mail? Will you really fall for that click bait? Stick with the main story, preferably your own!

Photo by Dustin Diaz

Humps For Days

“Hey dad, what should I draw next?”

“Draw a camel.”

“Okay, how many humps do you want it to have?”

“Just one”

camel

Camel humps store fat (not water). These humps provide nourishment to the camel when food sources are low. When the fat reserves are utilized, the humps sag like deflated balloons. It takes two things to “re-inflate” the hump:

(1) Food

(2) Rest

Your dreams, your vision for what you REALLY WANT TO DO OR BECOME is like a camel hump. There are times when it is full and robust. There are times when it is drooping and appears like a wilted flower. A vision must be fed, then affirmed through appropriate action. A vision must be protected (like rhino horns). Achieving a vision doesn’t occur overnight, so take some rest. Allow time for your thoughts and efforts to digest. Dream, act, rest.  Dream, act, rest.  Dream, act, rest. It’s a constant cycle. If you are not where you want to be it is because one or more elements of this cycle have been neglected.

THE CHALLENGE:  Too many “humps” equates to mediocrity. Pick a single hump to focus on. After tending to all of life’s responsibilities, that’s about all we really have time for anyway. Now, go re-inflate your hump! Here are three way to do this…

(1) Go dream

(2) Go act

(3) Go rest

 

Photo by compassrose_04

Behave Like a Tailor

In my world, it’s bad advice to “make a goal and then tell everyone you know so that they will help hold you accountable.”  Maybe that’s because I fail a lot.  Even when I tell my most trusted friends and family members – I still fail.

“Tell the world what you are going to do, but first…SHOW them!”

I take that back.  I don’t fail.  (I often say “fail faster” – but not in the sense of ultimate failure.)  I change.  I learn and grow.  I adapt.  I aim, pull the trigger and then adjust accordingly.  Sometimes I realize that a target is out of reach, or too close. Sometimes it’s the wrong target altogether. Admiditly, there are occasions when I don’t know what the heck to shoot next.

“Be fluid because flexible is too rigid.”

The reason I try to keep my mouth shut and play “show then tell” is because I dislike explaining my decision(s) to people.  Can you relate?  I found a quote today that I believe is worth reflecting on.

tailor

“I had become a new person, and those who knew the old person laughed at me.  The only man who behaved sensibly was my tailor: he took my measure anew every time he saw me, whilst all the rest went in with their old measurements and expected them to fit me.”  George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950).  Man and Superman 1, 1903

THE CHALLENGE:  People around you are constantly changing from day to day.  We are on a personal journey twisting and turning as a leaf falling from a tree.  Every day as you encounter your associates, friends, and most especially your family members – behave like a tailor and take their measurements.  See how they feel.  See what outlook they have.  See if anything has changed from your last encounter.  Allow them space to transform or modify their thought process.  This will add a rich dimension to your relationships and conversations.

Are You a Back Row Believer?

In the Navy, we frequently say, “Fill it in from the front!”  It’s a simple way to show good order and discipline.  It avoids unnecessary gaps or dead space in seating arrangements. It shows respect and courtesy for the speaker, while also allowing any stragglers to sneak in without disturbing others.

“Hey, are you guys on the back row Catholic?”

This question came from a Navy Rear Admiral in a meet and greet at my command.  She went on to express the ease of leaving church after communion, particularly if you sit in the rear. Another senior officer chuckled softly, “That’s how I do it.”.

catholic

I found it peculiar that individuals intelligent and persistent enough to have risen through military ranks would be so partially committed to their faith.  Then again, maybe that’s the secret to their success.  In life, you can have anything but not everything.

Preparedness on the left
means lack on the right.
Preparedness on the right
means lack on the left.
Preparedness everywhere
means lack everywhere.
The Art of War

There are things in life that you ought to be sitting in the back row for, but instead, you’re up front.  Maybe for you, it’s social media, video games, fantasy football or feeding an unhealthy addiction.

There are areas of your life that you should be fighting for the front row but settle for the back.  You do the bare minimum and move on to something else – sneaking out the rearward exits without a trace!  What “front row” should you be keeping warm?  Perhaps it’s making prime time for the family, furthering your education, exercise, healthy eating, or time management.

THE CHALLENGE:  Examine key areas of your life intellectually, physically and spiritually. Determine if you are sitting in the appropriate row for each item.  When you discover a need to move, take immediate action.

(By the way – immediate action looks like this.)

Think of the row you sit on as a direct reflection of your belief in a particular goal or mindset etc.  Remember, there is always room at the front!

Photo by William Murphy

Blenders Hurt…Bad!

Have you ever had a bad handshake?  How does it feel?  Nasty right?  Perhaps the giver extended a “limp fish,” maybe their hands were wet, or dirty.  You might suspect they just came from the bathroom and didn’t wash, or they just picked their nose.  Fortunately, not all handshakes are bad.

Have you ever heard someone say, “I got to shake their hand!“?  As if they met someone so acclaimed and celebrated you questioned your friend’s grip on reality (no pun intended).  Maybe you wondered if your buddy would ever wash their hands again. Or maybe they even boast about “front row seats” and “how close” they got to someone famous.

Google a list of the “10 most famous people” and you will amass a frightening medley of lineups.  Just picking a list of the 10 best athletes, musicians or actors is hard enough (Not that I have ever tried, or care to).  But who can’t think of someone they wouldn’t mind brushing shoulders with?  Whose hand would you shake?

What if we treated ourselves with the same adulation as the person you just thought of? What if we acted with so much integrity that we knew a simple handshake with ourselves made any ambition of ours a DONE DEAL?

blender

THE CHALLENGE:  Instead of sticking your hand in the blender every time you make a commitment to yourself.  Meditate upon the high degree of honor, integrity, and passion you will devote to your pledge.  Start appreciating the handshakes with yourself just as you would for that celebrity of choice.

Images by Julia Taylor and pixishared

If you like this article you may also enjoy
(1) Bunny’s Dilemma
(2) Painful Pervasive Poaching
(3) Don’t Drop Your Nuts
(4) The Oldest Trick in the Book
(5) Goal Punching

 

The Freaks Come Out at Night

I heard the following remark while conducting security rounds at work, “That door must not have been opened in weeks, just look at all the cobwebs.”  At first, I thought the observation was brilliant and perhaps for this particular application it was.

I began to ponder this concept and realized it may not be brilliant thinking when applied to our own lives. When is the last time you walked into a spider web and thought, “Darn it! That web must have taken months to construct. I’m so sorry for that poor spider!”

Answer: Never.

Most webs are temporary, assembled overnight – here today, gone tomorrow. We assume the webs on the door have been there for ages. Maybe so, but in most cases the homeowner has long since vacated the sticky premises. Granted, this analogy will be limited since some spiders don’t spin webs or may even come in superhero format.

For our purposes though, let’s consider common varieties. Think of the spider that seems to spin a web at precisely the point you need to walk through. Before you go to bed at night there isn’t a spider in sight, the yard is free and clear. Inevitably, when you walk outside in the morning you get ambushed by silky strands dispersed across your path.

These spiders are smart. They don’t work in the sunlight when it’s dry and hot. They weave at night. This protects them from predators, increases the longevity and functionality of their web and increases the odds of trapping nocturnal insects such as moths. Spiders are also diligent. If you knock their web down one day, it will be back the next.

THE APPLICATION: We all have cobwebs in our lives. Everyone has a “spider” that they can’t seem to get rid of. Your spider might be a negative thought that encourages you to stay home from the gym and sit on the couch. “I don’t want to have to deal with that cobweb today,” you think to yourself.

Maybe your spider is a lack of faith in doors that you would otherwise have the potential to open. So, you lecture yourself with the same old narrative, “I can’t become president, I can’t get a raise, I can’t ask that person out, I can’t find a better job, I can’t write that book etc… just look at all the cobwebs on that door. It has never opened up for me, why should I try now?”

Your spider might be you as a whole. Yes, that’s right…you might be the spider. You might appear “creepy” and put others off, perhaps you make them scream (if but silently). Maybe you spread fear, irrational or even legitimate. People want to avoid you or squish you.

THE CHALLENGE: Realize that cobwebs are strong and deadly…to insects. But you are not an insect. Running into a web will be frustrating. It might feel nasty and require your attention. But then it is gone. You are still free. A web has no power over you. Identify your spider.  Get into the corners of your life and knock the webs down. Find your cobwebs, get beyond them and open the door. Just remember, the web will be back tomorrow. Accept this fact and life will become a whole lot easier.

If you ARE the spider. Seek help you freak! Open yourself up to frank feedback from others.  Develop a little self awareness. Make a change!

 

Photo by Sebastian Galiano

Paper Text

Do you remember when business cards were in vogue?  Okay, maybe you still use them (but not for long). How about Trapper Keepers or My Pet Monster?

Who doesn’t periodically reminisce on trends from the past? So many things have come and gone. I wonder why they have to go. Why were my favorite cartoons not good enough to catch on? Why don’t my kids know what a G.I. Joe is? Why did music change so radically? Is this because of contract obligations, licensing agreements or the rising generation’s need to be original? I guess I will never know.

Long before the digital age we used to “email” by putting pen to paper. We had pen-pals! Life was so slow that we would actually write strangers (sometimes across the globe)  as part of our school work. It would take many days or even weeks before getting a response.

Our “text message” used to be a physical note passed during class when the teacher wasn’t looking. Sometimes the note was exchanged in the hallway or slipped into someone’s locker. I’m not sure if the youth still do this, but I imagine the great majority of communication is via smart phone.

Today (during a meeting) I received a text message.  It was a photo of a study guide and an emoji – thumbs up.  My response was also an emoji – baby bottle. Except to the senders, both messages were vague, cloudy and superficial…ESPECIALLY mine!

I later wondered what this communication would have looked like in an “old school” format. If we put pencil to paper and passed it along, I believe the message would have been much different. The “smart” phones that we rely so heavily upon do a really good job at keeping us “not-so-smart”. We get so used to taking shortcuts that we often slice off the horn of our entire message! On the flip side, sometimes we replace “chat” with “text“. Though, these should never be confused. Our time evaporates typing a lengthy message that would otherwise only take a few seconds to speak.

Class notes were somewhat ideal, given their era. In general terms, they required two way communication. The receiver was usually happy to receive the memo. The message was sufficiently succinct. Dialogue was often very open – just consider all the blushing faces when the teacher would snatch a note off of someone’s desk!

THE CHALLENGE: If applicable, think back to your school days. If notes were as easy as text messaging is now, who would you ping? What would you write? Do you wish there was someone you had sent a note/message to but didn’t?

Next time you are in a meeting, think about who you might want to message. If the gathering happens to be with a group of strangers you can skip the whole business card thing and just ask for their number. Tell them you might reach out for their opinion during the lecture or conference.

Forget the “status updates.” Forget the spam! Nobody cares about “the weather.” What clear message can you send? How can you add value? If this were a handwritten note, would it be different? How so? What meaningful dialogue can you start? Consider that our present text messaging age will eventually be a thing of the past, something future bloggers will reminisce over. Will you wish you had established a friendship with someone while you still had frenzied fingers?

Maybe the opposite is true. For you social butterflies, maybe you need to cut back. Almost every note passed now is “caught by the teacher.” The teacher is social media.  The teacher is your profile. The chalkboard is now digital and our names are on it. Are your kids wondering why you pass notes all day instead of paying attention in class? Where is your middle ground? I challenge you to find it and exploit it!

Photo by hundrednorth

Painful Pervasive Poaching

Over 1,000 rhino’s are poached each year for a single body part, the horn. Apparently this pointy steak skewer is worth a small fortune on the black market. Not that I have any idea how much $$$,$$$ I could get for one, and here’s why:

  1. I can’t think of a single use for a keratin spike.
  2. As far as my corner of the globe is concerned rhinos are already extinct…even looked outside my window to verify.
  3. I respect the wishes of rhino advocates who ask that this information not be published.

Interesting fact: Rhino horns grow back – provided they are cut properly.  In an effort to deter poachers, de-horning is a popular (and very costly) trend.  De-horning is a process similar to cutting your fingernails – only much shorter. What if you were a rhino? How would you feel about this?

What if humans were poached for a valuable body part? What if outside organizations trimmed us up a little bit to keep us safe? Can you imagine a society with no left hands, right feet, or in this case noses? Perhaps you would feel angry, useless, violated, or depressed – as you should!

We all have an individual “rhino horn”, something that makes us truly unique. Your horn is that which you value most. It might be another person, your family, a goal, a vision, a talent, a home, or a reputation.

Every single day, your horn is at risk. Marketing campaigns, political agendas, two-faced acquaintances or outright enemies will poach you without a second thought. You have something of value and someone else wants it. It might be your money. It might be your voice. It might be your silence.  It might be your indifference. It might be your support.

THE CHALLENGE: Identify your personal rhino horns.  For the sake of this exercise there should be two; a primary and a secondary, just like the animal. What will you do to protect your horns?

For example, if your primary horn is your family, what specific systems can you set in motion to improve how to mentor your children or how to make your spouse’s heart skip a beat? Do your children have free reign on the internet? What information do they access? Is your home protected? Do you have insurance and health benefits? Do you have savings? What about family traditions? Do you keep a journal to leave for your posterity? What about your ancestors? Do you keep in touch with mom and dad, grandparents or great grandparents? Do you reflect on their teachings? Do you protect any heirlooms left behind? The ways that you can safeguard this “horn” are infinite…but only you can decide what is best for your own circumstance and belief system. Maybe this is something worth pondering next time you earn couch time. Give it a try!

Photo by Jin Kei

Books by the Bushel

The number of people I have met who hate to read or refuse to read is baffling to me. Not long ago reading was reserved for upper classes of society. To not read was to remain in ignorance. We now have an opportunity to harvest vast bushels of knowledge. Information that previous generations would kill to have.  Much of the wisdom waiting in the pages of books goes unnoticed as we reach for the quick fix provided by a newspaper or magazine. Even then, it seems we’d rather read emails and text messages or embrace quick Google searches (more on that in a future post).

Walking into the library today, I noticed that my boy struggled mightily to hold all 10 books that he had previously checked out. I wondered why he checked out the maximum quantity. I wondered who set that amount in the first place. In the midst of my judgmental state of mind, my memory reverted back to my own past. Each week I would go to the library and check out the maximum number of books. Right or wrong, these books helped satisfy my immense curiosity for nature and instilled a love for reading but more import, a love for LEARNING!

This year I discovered the power and simplicity of audiobooks. I get through each title in a FRACTION of the time, not just for being in audio format but because I listen at 2X the “normal” speed. Best of all, Overdrive (among others) allows you to check out books for free. I have completed over 50 books this year and still have six months to go! It didn’t take much “effort”, but it did take consistency and a commitment to use my time wisely.  It doesn’t take much to put some headphones in while you clean, exercise or get groceries.

All of these books have taught me something, and a few of them have changed my life altogether. I can name at least five that are game changers. I therefore see no need to own all 50+ books. I don’t need a vast library. However, I do want to recognize the best of the best.

THE SOLUTION: Give yourself boundaries, such as “I intend to read _____ books by the end of the month, quarter, year, decade etc.  Next, identify your “all-stars”. All-stars are the books that you think about without any concious effort. These titles resonate with you and influence you continually. Finally, among your all-stars, identify your “hall of fame” books. These are books so good that you would reread them periodically and recommend them to anyone at anytime.

THE CHALLENGE: This challenge is directed to me, but I invite you to modify it to meet your own needs. Select 3 books per year (maximum) to add to your physical library. Limiting the number of slots allows you to really evaluate the book’s intrinsic worth. You will find that titles will seem to fight for those positions.

Once identified, purchase only used copies and lend them out frequently. Place your hall of fame books on display where you can view them at a glance, drawing immediate inspiration as you ponder the “collective intelligence” each title has provided for you.

Photo by Deven Dadbhawala

Plump Popcorn Payoff

Try this… ask the next person you see to slap you in the face. That’s how it feels to pay for a bucket of popcorn at the movie theater. You’ll spend a small fortune! This is one example where I wouldn’t recommend paying for the date.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume that you’ve popped some corn. Too easy, right? But what if the goal was to pop 100% of the kernels. Now it becomes an entirely different challenge. There is always a collection of headstrong kernels that adamantly camp at the foot of the bag. If you attempt to pop these, you run a most assured risk of burning the rest of your tasty snack.

It’s easy to stop here. Your carton or bag appears to be topped off. Why not just eat what you have and get full?  Nobody gives those stubborn kernels an afterthought, so why should you? Just toss them!

But what if we are talking about people? Doesn’t each corn kernel pop at a different time?  Each piece responds to a predetermined level of moisture within the shell. Most people “pop” together – give or take. Just think about grade school. Some students were kept back a grade, but most progressed. Each culture has a set of benchmarks that most folks satisfy such as marriage or moving out of mom and dad’s house.

THE CHALLENGE: Let’s say you are a leader, a manager, a supervisor, a parent, a friend or a coworker to a stubborn “kernel”. Don’t toss it in the trash, it does have the potential to pop. Your task is to create the right conditions. The groundwork is there. We all have the “moisture” inside. Find a way to make more heat. Remember not to burn the rest of your stash. Too much training on the same topic will burn the initial crop of plump poppers. The remainder however, these stubborn kernels…demand one-on-one leadership. Go mentor! Go lead! Make heat! Get the payoff!

Photo by clindstedt